divorce advice for men

THINKING ABOUT DIVORCE?

According to the media, January and February are peak times for people to consider a divorce.  Whether it is because it is a new year and they want a new start or because the weather is so miserable, people have run out of money after Christmas, there is not a lot to look forward to,(…)

WHO HAS THE CHILDREN?

When parents separate a key question is what is going to happen to the children.  Contrary to popular belief both parents not just fathers, fear that they will see less of their children.  Obviously dads worry that they may not have so much contact with their children but mums worry about that too.  The question(…)

NEW LAW FOR PARENTS

On the 25th February MPs passed the new Children and Families Bill which extends the statutory rights for parents in relation to their children’s upbringing.  This has an impact in both employment and family law.  One example is that maternity leave, available from two weeks to 12 months following birth can be used by the(…)

THE HIGH COST OF DIVORCE

There has been plenty in the press recently about the rising number of complaints about family lawyers, in particular to the legal ombudsman.  The main reason for those complaints seems to be the cost of divorce in terms of legal fees.  I am not going to defend the position of family lawyers here but I(…)

PAY-AS-YOU-GO FOR LEGAL SERVICES

Employing lawyers can be expensive which is why we have introduced a new way to pay.  It is actually a completely different way of using or accessing legal services.  We want to make it as easy as possible to get advice that you can afford.  Obviously the more time you spend with the lawyer the(…)

FALLING IN LOVE OR HARASSMENT?

You may have heard on the news about recent changes to the law on harassment.  By coincidence I am reading a book by Robert Dunbar ‘The Signs of Love and Betrayal’ where there is a description of a recognised condition known as Clerambault’s syndrome (named after a French psychiatrist) which is an obsession or more(…)

THE BEST LAWYER?

This blog was prompted by a telephone call I received late one Friday from someone extremely anxious about the way his separation was going.  He had hoped to keep things fairly low key and amicable between himself and his wife.  A family friend was acting as a go between in helping them to sort out(…)

A CHILD’S DILEMMA

I am reading a fascinating book at the moment – ‘The Science of Love and Betrayal’ by Robin Dunbar, it is all about why people fall in love, is there any scientific or logical reason for this, does it actually help the development of the human race? It appears not, we do not actually need(…)

WHO IS TO BLAME?

I sometimes think that blaming someone else is a national sport, as a nation we seem to be quite good at it. If there’s a problem then we blame the bankers, the politicians, those claiming benefits, those not paying taxes. It’s never our fault or our responsibility. An interesting example is education. Employers are always(…)

THE MODERN MEDEA

Medea is a Greek Tragedy written by Euripides around about the 5th Century BC. It tells the tale of a wife scorned by her husband so enraged by her predicament that she takes revenge through their children. In her desire to hurt him she kills their children. Far fetched? Well, I have just been listening(…)

CHANGING THE FAMILY – FOR THE BETTER

Everybody is aware that divorce rates are rising and there is supposedly a crisis with the nuclear family in Britain. We look back to some mythical time in the 1950s with its low divorce rates and seemingly perfect happy families, to a time that we may want to emulate. However, there were very real social(…)

LEGISLATIVE CHANGES ABOUT CONTACT AND RESIDENCE?

Every so often we have a debate on parental rights about whether there should be an automatic assumption that both parents should play an equal role in their children’s lives if they separate or divorce.  The debate normally centres around the argument of whether or not the Courts have a bias in favour of the(…)

5 MORE WAYS TO AVOID SEEING A DIVORCE LAWYER

Following on from the previous blog here are 5 more issues to consider:- 1)   Children. They can be a source of great joy, but also of great stress. Becoming parents introduces a different dynamic to your relationship. Be prepared to adapt to this and support one another. 2)   Take a look at your spouse’s parents(…)

10 WAYS TO AVOID A DIVORCE LAWYER – Part 1

1)   Marry the right person. This may sound obvious, but it is amazing how many people really do marry the wrong person, or fail to take sufficient time to make sure they make the right decision. Far better to try and ensure a correct decision than have to undo the wrong on later. Divorce is(…)

IS DIVORCE CONTAGIOUS?

I have just come back from a few days in France, during which I read Malcolm Gladwell’s “The Tipping Point.” The book talks about how events that were, at one point unusual become common place, styles that were uncommon suddenly become all the rage. One example he used was Hush Puppies, a shoe that went(…)

HOLIDAY REFLECTION ON THE END OF LAWYERS

Just to cheer myself up while I was on holiday I re-read ‘The End of Lawyers?’ by Richard Susskind. It’s subtitled rethinking the nature of legal services and the gist of his argument is that we should be moving towards what he refers to as the commodification of legal services. This would make everything lawyers(…)

CIVIL PARTNERSHIPS – A NEW TYPE OF CONVENTION?

Civil partnerships recognise the validity of same sex relationships. They provide the same legal and social recognition as heterosexual couples who marry. It is a public statement, sign of commitment and a legally recognised category. As with marriage, civil partnership changes the legal relationship between couples and gives them certain rights, responsibilities and entitlements which(…)

THE DIFFICULTIES OF JOINTLY OWNED PROPERTY

The ownership of jointly owned property can be a minefield.  People can own it in all sorts of different capacities, all of which have different results if they fall out or want to sell the property. So, first of all, what happens if two people who are not married buy a property together?  You might(…)

DIVORCE AND BANKRUPTCY

We often come across people who have separated, but never quite got round to doing anything about getting divorced, or dealing with all the other aspects of their life together that may have to change because of their separation.  So for instance one party might move out of the matrimonial home leaving the other with(…)

PEOPLE DON’T FIT INTO BOXES

WHY I AM SO PASSIONATE ABOUT COLLABORATIVE LAW We all know that we are all different and yet we are always faced with situations and circumstances that try and generalise and fit us all into the same box.  In divorce the court assumes a standard separation, a standard divorce, a certain way of dealing with(…)

CHANGING FAMILIES

We perhaps all know that the traditional nuclear family – mother, father and children that they have produced together, although possibly the “norm” is by no means the only concept of “family” which society recognises. With the increasing recognition of same sex relationships, other family arrangements are made and it follows too that when these(…)